Delta's Diary #LesbianDiaries by Giselle Renarde

Delta's Diary
The Lesbian Diaries, Book 11
by Giselle Renarde

Can a big-city butch find community in a small town? 

Delta's sunk about as far as she can go when she moves in with her brother. He's in the same boat: his wife just left him and he's down in the dumps. They don't do much to cheer each other up, but at least co-existence is peaceful. 

When Delta crashes the town's Friday Night Queer Club, the girl she's got the hots for is not the one who wants her back. How she ends up with a girlfriend she doesn't even like is anyone's guess, but that's not the only thing ruining her chances with the femme of her dreams. Her crush claims to be straight, and she doesn't exactly ingratiate herself by doubting Melanie's word. 

Even when you've hit rock bottom, you can always sink lower. If there's one thing Delta knows how to do, it's burn bridges. 

How will Delta untangle the mess she's created when she's running on nothing but street-smarts and grit? 

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Read an excerpt from Delta's Diary:

Rylie's face fell. She asked me what was wrong. I told her nothing was wrong, but I guess she didn't buy that because she immediately started to cry. So I asked her why she was crying, and she said it was because she'd stripped naked and I was still standing there in my coat and boots. If I were genuinely attracted to her, I'd have thrown off my winter gear and attacked her like a lion pouncing on a gazelle.

I told her I don't attack people, no matter how attracted I am to them.

She sniffled and wiped both eyes with the back of her hand. I've got to admit, I liked the way her chest hitched as she whimpered. It was a strangely good look.

I kicked off my boots and unzipped my coat, asking where I should hang it. She'd flung her own jacket over the back of a chair. I couldn't see a closet.

“Just anywhere,” she said, so I piled my coat and hat and mitts on top of my grocery bags on the floor.

Rylie went to the bathroom to blow her nose, and I wandered into the main room. There wasn't much to the place, but I bet she appreciated having a whole apartment to herself, even if it was small. I sometimes miss having my own space, although Chris isn't bad to share a house with. He keeps to himself and I keep to myself. We're good like that.

When Rylie emerged, her hair was a little neater, although it still looked scraggly. She'd put on shiny pink lip gloss that didn't suit her at all, but she was clearly proud of it because she puckered as she approached me.

“You didn't take off your clothes,” she said.

I told her, “Yeah, I'm not likely to.”

She looked hurt again.

She was a small-town girl living in a lonely world, so I asked her, “Have you ever been with a big-city dyke?”

Her eyes went wide. I guess that was my answer.

“Have you ever been with anyone?”

“I'm gay,” she said. Her bottom lip quivered. “You can't tell me I'm not, because I am. I know I am.”

“Nobody's arguing with you,” I said, reaching gently for her arm. Her bare skin felt surprisingly warm, but maybe my hands were just cold from being outside. “I'm trying to figure out how experienced you are, that's all. I know you're gay. You told me you're gay and I believe you. I'm not gonna challenge you on that.”

Okay, so clearly she'd never been to bed with a woman, and she probably hadn't even been to bed with a dude, but if she didn't want to disclose her sexual history, that was fine.

Moving right along.

“How old are you?” I asked.

She mumbled, “Twenty-three.”

Jesus. Twenty-three.

“Cool, cool,” I said, but I'd never been the older party before and it made my stomach clench. I still felt too young to be in this position, but maybe everyone feels that way. I don't know.

She said, “I work. I pay my rent. I'm entirely self-sufficient.”

“Cool, cool,” I repeated, though I had no idea what that had to do with anything. This chick had gone from puppy dog to rottweiler and I wasn't sure why. I guess she felt like I was challenging her, and maybe I was. I probably should have just left, but, again, I didn't want to hurt her feelings.

And, again, she was completely naked.

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